Judging from your feedback, the gracEmail for May 18, 2008 titled “Knowing One Another” touched a live nerve. Following are a few responses (some edited for space or form). Thanks to all who wrote!
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“Can you imagine ACTUALLY ‘confessing our sins to one another’??? Yikes!” — Mike (msecuro777@yahoo.com).
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“Rarely, I’m convinced, do individuals share themselves on a deeply personal level. A larger part of social relationships are presenting oneself as consistently as possible to what we want people to think of us. . . That does not mean that there is no true and relevant relating but I think most of us rarely let another in on our deepest feelings, questions, fears and desires. We all have thoughts, desires and feelings that, right or wrong, we are ashamed of or for other reasons do not want (or fear) others knowing. . . .
“This is one of the amazing and powerful things about genuine, responsible, professional counseling relationships. Often there, more than in any of one’s ‘real’ relationships, a person may reach a level of honest sharing that can become deeply therapeutic and thus, in my view, highly spiritual. . . The more one has a need to be seen in a certain prescribed way (often one’s need to be seen as religious is such a barrier) the more difficult it is for one to drop the mask and take the very real risk of being rejected or judged negatively. . . I’m sure that a promise of confidentiality is essential for a healthy person to risk such honesty.
“Religious groups such as churches do provide a very important and effective emotional and physical support group to members. (Such support does not necessitate the kind of intimate friendship I am describing.) Such thoughts remind me of a truth I once heard that instead of human beings, we are humans becoming. This is what comes to my mind as we reflect on the possibilities of ‘knowing one another'” — Jim (jjimhib@juno.com).
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“And here I thought it was just about living in Los Angeles.” — Ron (halbert@ucla.edu)
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“The best thing I have experienced for getting to know others happened in our Bible study class. One brave teacher decided it would be good to have anyone who wanted to share what Christ had done in his/her life to do so. It was the most wonderful experience and helped us to see past the surface of the individuals to their hearts. There were a couple of women I had always seen as distant so I really had never reached out to them. After they shared their testimony, my heart ached for their pain and I really learned to love them deeply. We’re so busy trying to show our best side at church that sometimes we forget that that is the one place we should be loved no matter how ‘damaged’ or ‘weak’ we might be. We all are carrying around something that hurts and we need understanding and compassion. Maybe we need to trust each other enough to tell our stories to our church families. I know we’d feel closer to each other if we did.” — Carol (caroldraehn@hotmail.com).
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“Better than a Sunday morning sermon!” — Michael (michael@Do-OverClothing.com).
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“This week I turn 70. My mother started taking me to Church and Sunday School when I was three. Had it not been for the fellowship and support of my brothers and sisters in Christ I hate to think where I would be today. For this reason I treasure this exhortation.” — Roy (r60ames@windstream.net).
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“I experienced that depth of inter-personal relationship in a small house-based church fellowship. . . When we met around a little table with the Lord’s Supper on Sunday morning and each offered a short heart-felt prayer and a few words related to a passage we had been reading personally, the intimacy was evident. . . We did this twice a week for years, so . . . what remained was to love and support the persons who were known intimately. . . Even more importantly, I would observe that knowing God is the underlying strength of such . . . fellowship. It is in a daily intimate relationship with God in private prayer and personal reading of his word that we can come to know God. It is in knowing God intimately that our love for him grows strong, and it is in loving God with all our heart and all our soul and all our might, that we find it in our heart to truly love one another!” — Keith (kmcdonald8@cogeco.ca).