A gracEmail subscriber is struggling with bitterness toward his church heritage. He loves God and reveres Jesus as Savior but has lost interest in attending public worship, reading the Bible or praying. If he leaves the church in which he was raised, his father would consider him lost to God. He is silently resentful when his children come home from Bible class and relate their lessons with which he totally disagrees. “I’m stuck,” he says. “I’m frustrated, I’m bitter, and needing some advice. I’m also willing to admit part of the problem is me but I don’t know how to overcome it.”
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You are not alone in your frustration, bitterness and confusion. I do hope you can learn to distinguish between God and your church. You seemingly are taking out your anger at the church on God — by not reading the Bible and not praying. The way out of this morass will involve developing your relationship with the Father without regard to what this particular church says or does and without regard to your feelings about its teachings.
Determine that no matter what anyone says or thinks, you will cultivate an intimate relationship with the Father and be continually filled with the Holy Spirit. You cannot help anyone else, lead your family or be a growing Christian yourself unless you do this.
It might be helpful to realize that the church heritage that irritates you is not a monolithic, single-opinion entity, and that likely there are other people in your own congregation who disagree with some of the same things that bother you. You might begin to ask God to lead you to someone else in your fellowship who have constructive criticisms of unbiblical church traditions. Then begin to share spiritual life with them, encouraging each other without being destructively critical of others.