Archives for 2012

A Christian mother of two unmarried children over age 21, writes that both her offspring "seem to think we owe them a living," and expect their parents to pay for food and rent, while the children spend all their money on entertainment, or don't want to get a job. The parents have on "many occasions" paid for bail from jail, apartment rent and groceries for these children, who respond by being rude, disrespectful and destructive. The mother says that if she doesn't help them, she feels guilty -- although she thinks the more she does, the more disrespectful they become. She asks for my opinion … [Read more...]

A gracEmail subscriber writes: "My son-in-law is having a hard time respecting his mother, who left him with his grandparents when he was small until he was a teenager and then took him back to be a 'servant' to her and her new verbally-abusive husband. His grandparents are fine people and taught him Christian values which he practices. He has been a loving husband to my daughter for 15 years. He says he doesn't love or respect his mother, but he continues a relationship with her because he is a Christian and wants to do the right thing. Please tell me your thoughts on the subject of honoring … [Read more...]

A gracEmail subscriber has a married child in her 20's who is struggling in her faith. She and her husband rarely attend public worship and do not consistently manifest a Christian lifestyle, yet they agonize over these facts and express their wishes that things were different. The father asks how he can help them see that God loves them and desires to forgive them and to be their friend. * * * Your concern is shared worldwide by believing parents in the same situation. When our children were growing up, we attempted to pass on the faith to them by age-appropriate verbal teaching and … [Read more...]

A gracEmail subscriber who serves as a spiritual shepherd in his church asks whether the passage 1Timothy 3:4-5 means that he should step down from that role because his teen-age child has, for three years, had a bad attitude and has acted out in disruptive and inappropriate ways. The child's parents have lovingly dealt with the situation as best they knew, and are now about to administer tough love in the form of treatment at a faith-based residential facility. * * * I salute you for your conscientious concern. Let me answer by saying that the best and most mature literal shepherd is not … [Read more...]

A leader of a local church expressed concern that many teenagers appear generally disinterested and are sometimes even disruptive or unruly in church meetings. * * * We parents will most influence our children by our own example, and by informal, kind teaching at a practical level. If, when they are hurt, we regularly hug them, say, "Let's ask Jesus to help," then pray together for healing as we apply first-aid or whatever, it will make a lasting impression on young minds. If we confess our own wrongs to them, and admit that we need Jesus' forgiveness also, they will remember it later when … [Read more...]

A leader of a local church expressed concern that many teenagers appear generally disinterested and are sometimes even disruptive or unruly in church meetings. * * * Don't be overly discouraged about the teenagers. As I recall, when I was that age my class "chased off" several Sunday School teachers by just such behavior as you describe. The problem is not new by any means. The long-term key will be a transformation of church and family from institution to personal relationship and the transformation of spirituality from theoretical doctrine to individual involvement with the living Lord. … [Read more...]

A gracEmail subscriber writes: "As a mother of two young children, I want to parent them in a godly manner. The only scriptures I have found regarding physical discipline refer to 'blows' given with a 'rod' and leaving 'stripes' on the back. Can you comment on these scriptures (Proverbs 10:13, 13:24, 20:30, 22:15, 23:14, 26:3, 29:15). Christian parenting books and courses recommend not spanking when in anger, but I would have to be pretty angry to do the things recommended here." * * * As Christian parents, we have the awesome responsibility to train our children in godliness. Mothers can … [Read more...]

A gracEmail subscriber writes that his infant grandson is soon to be baptized, although Grandpa raised the baby's mother in a church that baptizes only confessing believers. This grandfather requests more information on the subject. * * * Whether babies ought to be baptized or not, their situation clearly differs from that of adult converts to Christianity. Christians on both sides of this issue agree that believing parents bear primary responsibility to nurture their children in such a way that with God's blessing the children will grow to personal faith and consciously commit their lives … [Read more...]

A gracEmail subscriber writes that his infant grandson is soon to be baptized, although Grandpa raised the baby's mother in a church that baptizes only confessing believers. This grandfather requests more information on the subject. * * * The New Testament does not specifically mention infant baptism or, for that matter, an "age of accountability" of older children. Luke does report "households" being baptized (Acts 10:24, 48; 16:15, 32). Some theologians suppose that those households contained infants; others suppose that they did not. The Book of Acts reflects a first-generation church in … [Read more...]

"Father Paul," a gracEmail subscriber and Roman Catholic priest from Pennsylvania, tells me I am confused concerning infant baptism. Even if it is not explicitly found in the New Testament, he explains, it is "a precious apostolic tradition," part of the oral teaching which the Apostle Paul equated in authority with apostolic writings (2 Thes. 2:15). Augustine (5th century), Origen (3rd century) and Irenaeus (2nd century) all attest to the practice, and Polycarp (born 1st century) might have been baptized as a baby. "I hope you can now respect the Catholic view," Father Paul admonishes. "It is … [Read more...]